It had been a great day. Between the scent of freshly baked cookies, hot cocoa, the sight of Christmas lights and ornaments, and the sound of happy laughter as Emi opened her presents, the van Loon home oozed Christmas spirit. This year, they didn't have to explain the gift-opening process to Emi. The toddler had barely spared a moment before ripping the wrapping paper away from her presents. Even better, she had been able to help clean up the wrapping paper. As long as her parents turned cleaning up into a fun game.
As night fell, Emi dozed off on the floor while playing with their newest family member. Emi's new pet--dubbed "Bunny" by his owner--was hopping around in search of food. Niels chuckled and scooped up the rabbit. It was still young, and small enough for Emi to hold comfortably. He seemed like the perfect fit. While Niels took Bunny back to his cage, Amanda carried their daughter to her nursery and tucked her in. She returned, to the living room only to find their first and only surviving pet, Ghost, sniffing around Bunny's cage. It reminded her how how gentle the large wolf had been when they first brought Emi home as a newborn. In fact, it was bizarre just how much a new pet felt like bringing home a new baby. Niels caught Amanda's dreamy gaze and inquired of her thoughts, but Amanda only smiled sheepishly and dismissed her thoughts as 'nothing much'. She walked to the couch where Niels sat and climbed into his lap. "Merry Christmas, mi amore. Ready to continue our tradition?" she asked with a cheeky grin. She winked and kissed him softly, secretly making a silent Christmas wish.
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As soon as they returned home from trick-or-treating, Emi insisted on going out to the backyard. It wasn't long before the toddler had stripped off her shoes and sweater and was running around in the grass. Her adorable laughter filled the air as she twirled around, enjoying the way her princess Belle dress billowed out beneath her. "Mama wook!" Emi exclaimed. Amanda chuckled. "I see you, sweetie," she told her. She waited a while longer, hoping that Emi's energy would soon dwindle, but she had no such luck. It had to be the candy. Meanwhile, Niels was inside, preparing dinner. Amanda thought perhaps that would be a good bribe. "Emi! It's dinner time, baby. Let's go in." "No." "Aren't you hungry?" "I wan' candy!" Amanda frowned. "No more, candy. Come on." She took the toddler by the hand, but Emi promptly pulled away. "No!" With a sigh, Amanda lifted Emi into her arms, ignoring her shrieks of protest. "Hey! I'll tell you what. I can a take some pictures of you in your pretty costume and then we'll go inside and take a bath before dinner. Yes?" Emi considered the proposition for a moment before nodding. "Oki," she said. Amanda smiles and set her back down. "Toddlers," she muttered as she withdrew her phone from a pocket. She took a step backwards, and chuckled as Emi posed. "Say cheese!" she cheerfully advised. Emi beamed widely. "Cheeeeeeeese!" Amanda immediately attached the picture to a text message and sent it out to her relatives. Happy Halloween, everyone! From a cranky princess Belle! (Don't let the smile fool you) :p Since their return from Tuscany, Amanda spent a lot of time reflecting. There, in the open meadows, beneath the clear skies, she’d been more aware of how miniscule they were in the universe. Compared to the planet, the sun and the stars, they were… nothing. She wondered at times if others looked upon her family with that same mentality. If her biological family thought of her as just another diminutive being in a world of people.
She thought about them sometimes. She considered contacting her father so he would have the chance to meet his granddaughter. At times, even her sisters crossed her mind. She wondered how her niece was doing. Did her niece have any idea that somewhere in this world she had a cousin and an aunt who had been excited for her birth? Life was so fragile. One moment, Amanda had been looking forward to being an aunt. To Emilia having a little cousin to grow up with. To her parents (the ones who'd raised) delighting in their new grandchild. Yet oh how quickly everything had fallen apart. Her estrangement from her sister, the divorce of her parents, the loss of friends she’d once considered family. It was as if they didn’t even matter. Even 2 years later, it still stung. Yet, looking at her toddler, who was intently watched Sesame Street on Niels' laptop, Amanda knew that their lives did matter. They had a thriving toddler. A happy little girl who loved to dance and frolic barefooted in the grass. Who loved horses and chocolate milk. Who, one moment, threw tantrums when she didn’t want to go to sleep but the next moment would climb into her parents’ lap and tell them how much she 'wuved' them. Emilia was a constant reminder that no matter how alone they felt in this wide world, they were important. To Emilia, they were the world. There was a profound peace that filled the atmosphere. There we times when no words were needed. They'd listen to the hoofsteps of the horses, to the wind blowing across the vast meadows, to the soothing sounds of a hidden creek nearby. They could feel the bond that linked them together, even when they weren't physically connected.
It was in precious moments like these that reminded Amanda that she chose the right path in life. In such a large world, there two souls had found each other. Her love for Niels was certainly eternal and she was ever grateful for him journeying through life with her. It was meant to be; all roads lead to him. The undulating terrain, the magical way in which the morning sun peeked over the green hills and the serene manner in which it departed... The fresh breeze that blew across the plains, the beautiful flowers that blossomed in the fields... The whinny of the horses as they grazed, Emilia's happy laughter as she frolicked barefooted through the grass... Amanda had certainly grown used to it all.
It was only a vacation, she knew. A surprise from her thoughtful hubby, but she was almost starting to feel at home in Tuscany. Emi certainly enjoyed being here. She'd developed a fondness for the horses there, especially for Dondola. Even the white mare seemed to like the toddler. A girl could get used to this... It's been lovely being in London and getting to see all of my family again. We were able to meet the littlest sister of the family, and she is so adorable. Emi always wants to take her home with us after we leave from visiting. *giggles* Aubrey's one lucky little baby. She has so many older siblings to give her attention. In fact, for the last few days, I can't even count how many pictures we've taken while Aubrey slept, cried, cooed, and just basically stared at us. She's cute no matter what she does. *laughs*
Now, however, it's time for us to leave London since soon Aubrey will be back on your with our parents. Hopefully we'll see them again soon, because Emi absolutely loves her little auntie. "Ow my..." Niels remarked. "We must've been like... 10 or 11 there." He smiled, sighing dreamily as he admired all the photos illuminated on the wall. "I'm so glad we're at this point now."
Who would've thought that almost 14 years ago, when two children first laid their eyes on each other, they would become partners for life? There were many times that Amanda tried to imagine her life without Niels, but she only imagined eternal melancholy and deep loneliness. She still thanked Kobe for bringing Niels into her life. The little boy who once would scale the walls just to be with her. Who would sneak away from his supervision just to tell her that he loved her. After a while of gazing at the wall that so many memories from their past, she wrapped her arms around his neck and drew him closer. "Don't ever stop loving me," she whispered. "I would never survive." "I would never be able to stop loving you, 'cause even the thought of us being apart rips me to pieces," he replied. A soft smile curled around Amanda's lips. "Good," she said. "Because you're stuck with me." She chuckled. "Happy anniversary, baby." |
Amanda at a GlanceNames: Amanda Pontremoli, Amanda van Loon Archives
August 2017
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